The past few months have seen a major focus on the issues of gender-based violence and gender equality. Many views have been presented and a very spirited debate has occurred. I have noticed in the process some very unbalanced and in some cases completely uninformed and erroneous statements regarding the church.
I believe the first thing that needs to be established is what is the church and what is the kingdom of God that Jesus spoke about. The church is designed to represent and establish the kingdom of God and his will on earth. God is perfect and he is love so it would be ridiculous to assert that God would create man (plural) and then establish policies and guidelines for man's existence that would be detrimental to him.
Some people within the church have misrepresented God but the same could be said for political parties, professions such as lawyers and doctors and others. There are principles that govern life on earth and no matter what our label, profession or calling, if we operate outside of those principles then we do a disservice to the name we bear but the profession or calling remains what it was designed to be. I have no issue with calling out and holding accountable, people who misrepresent their calling or profession. In doing so however we should also acknowledge those who do uphold the principles that they espouse. To do otherwise is defamatory.
God established gender and he established gender equality. He established love and he would obviously not want women or men to be abused. If we look at the principles Jesus espoused and delineated such as "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" it is clear that God and by extension his representative agency on earth could not condone violence against women or inequality between men and women. God is perfect and he put in motion the mechanisms for us to have the best life. We choose to abide by these principles or not to. Jesus stated his purpose for coming is that, "We might have life and life more abundantly."
God does establish order and authority in the world and according to his order he established the man as the head of the family not meaning for the man to dominate his family but order in the sense of having an identified chain of command in a family. It is he who very clearly initiated this so we would need to usurp God or decide that we are God to institute something else. To my knowledge scripture has no mention of men being the leader of a woman who is not his wife. He instructs men to love their wives as he would which means a man cannot represent God or the principles of the New Testament and physically (which obviously includes rape and physical violence) or psychologically harm her. To love like God loves means that you would care for, provide for to the best of your ability, protect and seek the wellbeing of your wife.
Even the concept of sex in marriage is clearly laid out in the book of Corinthians where it explicitly includes the word consent when it comes to sex between a man and his wife as shown in 1 Corinthians 7:5 - "Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control."
The true church that adheres to the principles of the word of God has produced the best, happiest, fulfilling, and longest lasting marriages than any other grouping. I know of so many marriages that have been repaired, enhanced, and are thriving because of adherence to these principles and I am prepared to compare notes with any other grouping to reveal the veracity of my statement. The clear evidence is obvious.
With regard to equality, this is another mischaracterization by some in the church. Sure, anyone can point to pastors and leaders who do not understand or have twisted views on equality but again the true church is the definition of equality. God designed man to provide for his family but there is the ideal and the reality. A man should seek to provide for his family because this is explicitly stated in scripture, but if the wife who is his designated "help meet" is in a better position than he is financially there is one family – not the man's family and the woman's family. In this scenario a man can even assist his wife in using her giftings for the benefit of the family, after all. The two shall become one. A man should never feel ashamed or slighted if his wife earns more than him. There were times when my wife earned more than I did and there was never an issue or discussion. We operated as one family, what was mine was hers – and what was hers was mine as needed, within the context of the family.
Women and men are equal in terms of mental capacity and certain abilities but on a physical level there are obvious differences and advantages each has based upon their design. A man is physically stronger than a woman by nature so they are not equal. A woman possesses certain qualities that a man does not so the man is not equal to her based upon her unique God given design. Equality is not sameness. Women should be paid the same for any work that they do that a man does in line with their capacity for the job. There are certain jobs that a woman is naturally more suited for and some that men are naturally suited for from a physical perspective but it does not mean that a qualified woman even in a physical field should be treated differently from a man. Each should be paid for their gift and capacity to perform, not gender.
I certainly am and have always been in favor of the protection of women from violence and equality in the workplace and society. What I am not in favor of is attempts to disregard nature and create confusion to the point where ideological science replaces true science and reality. Uninformed, or people with malicious intent to defame the church as a collective should be called out. There are many pastors and church leaders who understand and subscribe to God's design for marriage and family and who believe in the protection of women from violence and inequality. Those who do not see this are not looking or are looking for misrepresentations to bolster their diminishment of the powerful effectiveness of the church in society.
If you look a little deeper you will see people like myself who were considered the outcast of society, yet through the transformative power of the gospel of the kingdom and the principles of the word of God, I stand happily married after 37 years, faithful to my wife throughout and sharing responsibilities and resources within the context of the God ordained family structure. I know of many others who are in the same position. In fact, I have been blessed to mentor countless young men from gang and criminal backgrounds who are great husbands and fathers today. There are many who do not abide by the principles they espouse but the same can be said in every arena. The church is indeed an integral solution component and should be recognized as such, as a critical partner in solving societal issues since its inception and is indeed the greatest hope for the world because God is our hope and our salvation.
• Pastor Dave Burrows is senior pastor at Bahamas Faith Ministries International. Feel free to email comments, whether you agree or disagree, to pastordaveburrows@hotmail.com. I appreciate your input and dialogue. We become better when we discuss, examine and exchange.
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