Continuing with the theme for Mental Health Month 2023, "Look Around, Look Within", I thought it fitting to take a look at mothers and their contribution to our well-being.
Mothers contribute in many ways to the emotional and psychological wellness of the family. Far too many of us take for granted the tremendous contributions they make to the home, community, government, church, school, business, and national development. Mothers are powerful human beings with skills and gifts that are sometimes indescribable.
The following is a story of a mother and her awesome skills. A 20-year, stay-at-home mom of three went for a job interview for an administrative position in a leading firm. The promotional material for the job opening mentioned the need for someone with a wide variety of skills, discipline, and training.
She felt confident about her skills. During the interview, she was asked why she should be hired and what skills she would bring to the table. She had prepared for this question and had her answers ready. She said, "I bring many years of experience and have served in the following roles, often simultaneously:
Administrator: For years, I have managed the day-to-day organizing and administration decisions in consultation with my co-leader. I am also responsible for scheduling and training staff members who attained substantial growth themselves in the firm.
Events coordinator: I have organized and planned events for various occasions from small banquets to large dinner feasts.
Project manager: I have to organize and plan for the growth and development of my company. Expansion of buildings, managing of utility personnel – electrician, plumber, painter, etc.
Medical supervisor: I would coordinate the response to emergency medical needs of my staff. From the common cold to apparent strokes and heart attacks, often personally dealing with minor cuts and bruises of regular staff members.
Executive chef and cuisine connoisseur: I have served as the organizer and planner for providing what is needed for meals during fun times and executive occasions, staff meetings, and annual festive occasions.
Procurement director: I successfully managed the purchasing of daily, weekly, and monthly supplies for my firm. This includes but is not limited to supplies for daily meals, clothing, repair materials, etc.
Educational administrator: I served for many years as chief educator of my staff. Helping develop the necessary writing, reasoning, and cognitive skills to be effective staff members.
Ombudsman: My role for years has been to be a listening ear to grievances and complaints by my staff members. I successfully navigated through very difficult situations which ended with positive results. My staff members were satisfied.
IT coordinator and manager: It was my role to ensure that the technical network for the entire staff is up and running. I also provided training for staff members.
Mental health and wellness coordinator: My responsibility has been to ensure that my staff members' emotional and social needs are understood and met. This ensured maximum productivity for the staff."
Then, the interviewer raised his hand to pause her and said, "You have the job. You can start tomorrow morning. Because of your vast experience, exposure, and training, I will increase your starting salary." She went away rejoicing.
Never underestimate the commitment, skills, and power of a mother. Whether it is a full-time, stay-at-home mom, or a working mom, whether it is a single, never-married, divorced or married mother, she is far more valuable than rubies.
Although this story is truthful, sadly, there are far too many mothers who are not that confident and emotionally secure due to the way they are treated by their family and friends. Many have little or no support and are often misunderstood and treated with disrespect.
When a mother is not emotionally well, it impacts her offspring and other family members. The article, "What Impact Does Parental Mental Health Have on Children?" by the staff of Regis College, states: "According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, parental mental illness elevates a child's risk of developing mental illness relative to their peers, and when both parents are mentally ill, the child is even more likely to follow suit."
In addition, many mothers who experience perinatal and postpartum depression go through those times all alone. Some suffer in silence, even while battling with suicidal thoughts. Many don't even have a clue or lack empathy and understanding.
Dear readers, let's do our best to provide understanding, support, and care for our mothers' needs. They need us. Remember, the emotional and mental health of mothers also impacts the emotional and mental health of the nation. Look around, look within. Look at our mothers.
• Barrington Brennen is a marriage and family therapist. Send your questions or comments to question@soencouragment.org, telephone 327-1980 or visit www.soencouragement.org.
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