Bullies come in all shapes and sizes, and most of us have to deal with them at one point or another. However, bullying is a serious problem, not only in schools, but also both in the workplace, home, the military, playground and even nursing homes. Some cases have even been so serious that they have led to the victims committing suicide due to bullying.
Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose.
How bullying affects children
Bullying can make kids feel hurt, scared, sick, lonely and sad. Bullies might hit, kick, or push to hurt people, or use words to threaten, tease or scare them. The affects of bullying in a child's life, if not addressed, can lead them going through life being bullied by others even in their adult life or becoming bullies themselves.
Signs of children who are being bullied
o Children coming home from school with damaged or missing clothes.
o Children who come home with bruises and scratches.
o Children having trouble with school work for no apparent reason.
o Children deciding to use a different route between home and school or deciding to avoid their usual route.
o Children having nightmares.
o Children who start to become or feel irritable easily, upset, or feeling emotional.
o Thoughts of going to school become terrifying. Child pretends to be sick or just does not want to attend.
What can be done about bullying
o Know what kind of bully you are dealing with.
What does he/she does to others, and how he/she reacts with different situations? Aggressive bullies are likely to abuse physically and without hesitation. Taunting bullies are verbally abusive (calling names, making jokes, teasing, etc.). Indirect bullies, sometimes known as backstabbers, spread rumors, exclude others, and harass their victims whenever possible. Cyber bullies harass other people through instant messaging, e-mail, and any other electronic means.
o Work your way around the bullies.
Try to avoid them in school and social situations. If they take the same route that you do, try a different way; if they can't find you, they can't bully you. Show minimal reaction to bullying. Do not show the bullies that you feel hurt if they do something that makes you uncomfortable; just walk away. Bullies gain satisfaction from making others feel hurt or uncomfortable, so reacting to them will only encourage them further.
o Report all bullying to an authority figure.
Consider your parents, school guidance counselor, principal, boss, the police, or someone else who can deal with or punish the bully and protect your safety. It's important that you talk to someone about your problem to get it to end. Do not worry about revenge that the bully may take if you report the incident; they will hurt you anyway and appeasing them doesn't solve your problem or anyone else they are bullying.
Advice for parents
o Listen to your child, allow them to tell their story. Do not respond by telling them it is a part of growing up.
o Children should not have to put up with being hit or assaulted when they go to school. If your child has gained the courage to tell a teacher that he or she is being bullied it can be a crushing blow to be told that you are being silly or the other students were just teasing.
o If you suspect that your child is being bullied but is afraid to say anything, find a way to raise the subject or ask one of your child's friends if something is wrong.
o If your child refuses to talk to you, suggest that they talk to another adult such as a family member or a teacher.
o If your child discloses that they are being bullied do not rush in demanding to see the teacher, the bully or the parents. Doing that is the very thing that your child fears.
o Talk to your child about what they want to happen next. Suggest that they keep a record of the incident so that you would have concrete information to show the school.
o Make an appointment to speak to the class teacher or guidance counselor.
o The bullying might not stop right away, however, encourage your child to keep being open by telling you what's going on.
Parents should not give up. Remember that the welfare of your child is at stake.
Bullying consists of the following:
o Being teased, or called names.
o Being hit, pushed, pulled, punched, or kicked.
o Having money or other possessions taken.
o Receiving abusive text messages or emails.
o Being abused or attacked because of religion, gender, sexually, disability, appearance or ethnic or racial origin.
Bullying in any form and at any age is unacceptable.
o If your child is being bullied, we can help, telephone The Crisis Centre 24-hour Hotline at 328-0922 or 322-4999, or check out our website at www.bahamascrisiscentre.org or email us at bahamascrisiscentre@yahoo.com

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