Cast out the scorner, and contention shall go out; yea, strife and reproach shall cease. - Proverbs 22:10. These are times when anger, conflict, strife, and out of control emotions are eating to the very core of our sanity. Many people will tell you, without a blink of an eye, that they can't take much, when it comes to adverse situations. People are going through a lot, and the least disturbance causes them to take off on you, like a bat out of hell. I once consulted with the principal and faculty of a private Catholic high school for girls. I was helping them manage some conflicts they were experiencing - conflicts, which grew out of differences and which made them strangers to each other.
The school had a history of high standards and effective results in secondary education. Graduation from the school all but guaranteed a young woman successful college entrance. Owned and operated by a congregation of Catholic nuns, the school's faculty and staff had largely been made up of nuns with a strong commitment to teaching. They were not only committed, but also highly competent in what they did. Then changes began to crowd in on the school. Over a period of time the neighborhood in which the school was originally founded shifted dramatically from a high income to a lower income population. The black population began to outnumber the white population
. Transporting of students into the neighborhood and the addition of neighborhood students broke up the cohesive patterns of extracurricular activities. A fierce school spirit was disturbed. Lay teachers were added to the faculty. Black teachers were added. Male teachers were added. The school enrolment shifted from all white students to a few black students, to a majority of black students. The changes came bit by bit and piece by piece as the nuns tried to make their mission relevant to the needs around them. Alongside all the other changes, the financial base of the school eroded. The financial problems compounded all the other issues. There were conflicts between students, between faculty and students, between faculty members, and between faculty members and parents.
No one intended the conflict. In fact, all parties were surprised by it. No one was comfortable with the conflict. It caused feelings and behaviors which were not consistent with the Christian ideals of the people involved. The principal of the school was looking for help in dealing with massive changes and conflicts almost too complex to cope with. After preliminary work with the principal, I worked directly with the faculty of about 20 people. I felt helping the principal and faculty came first because this might enable them in turn to help students and parents. In my first meeting with the faculty, I used a visual model to help faculty members communicate with each other in as constructive a way as possibl.
I gave them the following instructions at a pace they could follow: o Form a large circle. Think of the circle as a large wheel which is helping the school move along. o Imagine spokes running from where you stand to a hub in the center of the wheel. o Think of the hub as the decision making center in the school where there is power to make the wheel move. o Take a position on the wheel based on where you see yourself in your ability to influence what is happening in the school. Move beyond the edge of the wheel if you feel you do not have any vital decision-making influence in the school. Stay on the edge of the wheel if you feel you have a marginal influence on what is happening in the school.
Move into the spoke and hub area if you feel you have some influence on decision making in the school, with the strongest influence near the hub. Each person took a position. Then I asked them to follow through on another set of instructions: o Look around to see whether they felt comfortable with where other people had placed themselves. o Move anyone they felt should be in another position to a position which seemed more appropriate. They cast uncomfortable glances at each other. No one moved anybody else at first. Then a nun stepped toward a man standing at the outer edge of the wheel. Without a word, she extended her hand and pulled him halfway toward the hub.
There was a sudden flurry of activity. People were being moved around like Chinese checkers - sometimes gently, sometimes with a nudge, or a slight push. I stopped the action again and asked them to reflect on their experiences. Perhaps as you read today, there is conflict and dissatisfaction within and without. Ezekiel's vision at Chebar was descriptive of a wheel in the middle of a wheel. And when the living creatures went, the wheels went by them. And when the living creatures were lifted up from the earth, the wheels were lifted up. I pray that today many wheels would be moving within circles of homes, schools, churches, governments and organizations so that the tale of our lives would be worth telling. E-mail rubyanndarling@yahoo.com or write to P.O. Box 19725 SS Nassau, Bahamas with your prayer requests, concerns, or comments. God's Blessings!
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